Desires Of Dust

I was very shy about sharing this publicly. Its something that is deeply imbedded in my heart, but I know that anyone who has never visited Nairobi will not understand. I decided to share this with you because you support these beautiful children by supporting me. I also think its imperative to know about these stories so you understand what you are looking at in the pictures I post. This is my story. Just one of them. I hope you may begin to form an accurate vision of this place. 

Dust is what I want to be covered in. Seas of browns and light reds pour into my dream-like vision. Little hands reaching for mine. I want my heart to be filled by smiles that generously are given to my foreign face. Nairobi, the land that I never expected to capture the title "home", is where I want to be. 

Almost a month to go and I feel the tug of my heart, the swells, as my thoughts are filled with Kenya. Yes, I want to be covered in dust and sand. It's inescapable when you are there. Yet it's a sign that clings to me, when I return to my resting place for that night, of where I walked. The sand and dust are light red. The faces are all brown. Both collide to form an ombréish painting.  I want to be back to where that is all I see. I want to feel the touches of hundreds of hands throughout the day grasping for me, yearning to touch the unfamiliar white skin that I have, desperately desiring one glance from my eyes. I loved the kids running to me shouting "How are you?". They surrounded me with joy. Each touch reminded me of my purpose: to love. Their smiles were infectious. Despite the surroundings of tin houses and tattered dusty clothing, walking through the Mathare Valley was joy. My heart longs to be there. To be in the place where I only spent two weeks. I never expected it to leave a well in my heart.

These are all things I long for. Things that most will never understand. What I know for certain is that no one could understand the unexpected feeling that swelled up in me on my first day. This feeling took me by complete surprise: Jealously. It was felt the first night as the grace house workers sung to us as we poured out of our buses, singing with the brightest smiles and genuine desires to serve us. It was felt when I was surrounded by the disabled children. The way they were closed off and quiet then transformed into typical rambunctious children. All because they had unshakable joy. A joy that could only come from the father. A joy unknown to me in America, where food and medicines are abundant. Where we can have any want within moments of wishing it. So why do we not have this joy? 

I will never forget the convicting realization that they have more than we Americans will ever know. They have absolutely everything they need and are assured in that one thing. They have total reliance on God. Each child has nothing to rely on but him. Is that not exactly what God asked of us? We are supposed to serve one master, we are supposed to drop our nets, we are supposed to crawl and bow in the dust of our maker. These children and people do that every moment. They praise the Lord with all their might to have been fed and given the opportunity to go to school. Their small beautiful voices praise God so wholeheartedly that it's captivating to watch. So yes I am jealous of these children, I am jealous of their trust in God. 

I decided to share that with you to reveal my heart. So you know that I am wholeheartedly in this. To know that the foundation that I took over my Jr. year of high school was breathed from echoes of the children's hearts. This is simply what I felt. I once again hope that sharing this with you cleanses your views of Nairobi. That it renews your take on the children that you pray for and support. 

Thank you for allowing me to pursue Gods will. It's a gift to be surrounded by a community that builds up and gives whole heartily and generously. Thank you sincerely. 

Xoxo in his love, 
Mads

The Story

Hey All,

So these past weeks have been a waiting game. I have been praying about what to do, where I am going, and how to accomplish these things God has laid on my heart. The reason for all this praying is because God has been stirring my heart. Literally. I feel it. Its hard to breathe sometimes and thats how I know God wants me to stop and be still in his presence. As these moments have come, I felt led to type my story. The one that started with my first sponsorship and led me to where I am now.

In sixth grade I sponsored my first child. I was passing by a compassion booth at a youth conference and found a young girl named florence. I remember her eyes, they told a lot about her. I saw pain. Something I did not understand. So I sponsored her, without asking my parents. I just decided that it was something I should do. So I took her picture, filled out the form, and gave the lady the $30 my dad gave me to buy t-shirts and things. That began my affair with Florence and Africa. I was given an opportunity with two of my friends to present her picture to the class and read her letters that she wrote me. That in itself was a blessing. I was able to tell the Jr high about this child! I fell in love with the thought of Africa, I googled pictures of Rwanda and sucked up all the information I could get about it. I thought, in my little sixth grade mind, I am going to go to Africa one day.

Fast forward to Junior year, God was stirring my heart again. He does this usually at night. I lay my head on the pillow and I am wide awake. Then I am like, OK God what do you want to tell me. He usually shows me some pictures in my head. All I saw were t-shirts. I felt that I should design something to raise money. I had no idea what it would be for or what the shirts would look like. So I prayed about it for a while. It took a few months of thinking and praying for me to actually get a design down. I asked a friend to draw out a picture of a small village lit up by the moon with some hills in the back. That is all I saw in my head. That is what God gave me.

A few weeks later I went to a girls night in at my church. There was a woman and a man that performed a skit. This was to bring awareness to us little girls about the prevalence of sex trafficking. Boom that was it! God wanted me to give the money to them! Fast forward a few weeks and I sat down with them over coffee. They showed me some pictures, but what stood out to me was one picture. The exact same vision God gave me of the moon lit village. He was confirming the lead I took for him. As if to say "Child, this is my plan for you. Follow me."

So the t-shirts went and many people were able to hear about Gods loving ways. The ways he leads his children and cares for each of us. Family members held a garage sale and raised an extra $800 for me. All of this from one vision that God so generously gave me that one night. I raised about $3000 for Kenya.

My dad approached me with an opportunity to continue his organization in my name. He saw in me what God placed in me, a passion for "the least of these." I started the organization under the name my father gave it "The Samaritans of Mokena", and presented One Light with a check. This is how the organization started. From the picture of a little girl, to donating enough money to place a roof on a school, God had a plan.

Taking this full circle to now... the waiting game I was in recently. I now have been to Kenya and the Czech Republic and will be returning to Kenya again in May. I cannot tell you how in love I am with those people and the place. Yet, I know that I still have much to accomplish through God for the organization. I transitioned it to have its mission "To be on the front lines of abolishing human trafficking by restoring Gods children." I know that I need to change the name to fit this new mission. I have been waiting for what to do next. How can I start to accomplish this goal of fighting against trafficking? I still do not know what to do, but he is working and encouraging me through his people. Thank you for the prayer because I feel it and see it working. God has been showing me glimpses in his timing of what to do next and where this is going. So thank you all so so much for the support. Its overwhelming and I cannot help but thank our father for this all.

To those of you who have donated to my next trip to Kenya, THANK YOU! You are so generous and supportive. I cannot do it without you. If you would like to donate, please write a check out to The Samaritans of Mokena and send it to: 11646 Kluth court, mokena, Il.

XOXO,
        Maddie